how many girls called you today?

zero

how many girls called you the day before?

zero

what's zero plus zero equal?

fag

a teaser shot of goofy blue jays game photos with the asshole and company. we were tanked within seconds from our eleven dollar pints+ and i realised today how much of a fag i am for hot dogs and nachos. turns out the asshole is even more of an asshole than I am when it comes to telling people off whilst drunken bicycle-riding.

raymi: it's not your right of way

the asshole: hey hey hey come on

cabby: hurry the hell up then

raymi: fuck you

the asshole: blow me you fuck

you cats totally have to come out to this. these babes, whom no one fucking cares about in toronto cuz you're all dicks, are comin' all the way from scotland to grace the silver dollar on spadina, NOT college as it incorrectly states in the flyer. Nick Flanegan will be there doing his awkward, knee-slapping stand-up, some other dj shit and most importantly i'll be there - drunk and i'll probably make out with you. why not. i have like, zero standards.

i have a boner. this dude said fancy things about me. TONYPIERCE SPEAKS. His site puts me, you, your uncle to shame. it really makes you shake your head. anyhow, check out Interview with an escalator and you'll see what i mean.

full-stop.

ceiling at the classiest karaoke divebar in the city.