me being an idiot singing dyer maker and getting yelled at by my dad

i wore big hooker boots yesterday that i had never worn before and i wasl ike jeez i got all dressed up and we're only going to stay there for 30 minutes and he's like dressed up? ya, dressing up for me consists of hooker boots or shoes with heels.

today when lina was washing my hair over and over again in the sink i had a convulsive laughter attack and everyone in the salon looked at me and some men i think got turned on. she was like looohren why is thees happenin' does this happen when you wash your own hair? ohmygod only on the left side of your head.

my grammar had a crazy stroke one time when she got dunked under cold water and lost her memory this other time after swimming in a pool, looked at my dad and said who are you?

so kuz of my retardedly sensitive skull i missed out on lina's massadge. i always feel like a goony perv when hairdresser's do that to me. bina would come over and they would argue in porchugeuse and the esthetician called me crazy when my mum tole her i shaved off half my eyebrow and then my mum said yep she's crazy. but it was an accident.

there was this old shaky lady with parkinson's there and she gets a perm once a year and even took the bus all by herself and she's 86. where do these old people come from?

i ate an egg salad sammich and gave half of it to the black tall town crackhead and he took it without thinking i coulda put spit innit.

whatever, you'd eat my spit.

my pussy always gets wet when i lay in that tanning bed. i left all my face make-up on kuz im lazzy so my wu-tang name would be ghostface toffeebawdy. that was gay. i rolled my eyes at myself.

went to my crazy doctor appointment today after i had my hair fixed, dyed black with white/blond streaks and a trimmy trim. i told him about my panic attack after smoking a j and walking to the store. i was too afraid to get out of my bed. blah faggity blahhh. then we went tanning after i confronted kristi and got all my shit back. her brother is punching holes in walls now and losing weight and got kicked out of school. definitely on coke. i looked in on her parents, stressed-out as they were sleeping in bed at 5 in the afternoon and they looked dead, her father with his hands crossed over his chest and mother with her head cradled in the hook of his one arm.

neway. happy friday.

i always wanted to be a blow-up doll.

i just shoved the biggest avacado maki in my mouth. jeopardy king says they are nothing but fat. really?

i dated this guy for six months when i was 16.5 and i faked a british accent for the first month and a half. what a mental case. saurav was his roommate. i said i was from devon, england and that's where saurav was from also so when he asked me where exactly in devon i had lived i said the northwest part. neeeahht. so when i told the guy it was a fake accent he didn't flip out exactly he was just like wow you're real voice is such a turn-on. cool. this is when i dressed all glamorous, sex 'n the city steez and had long blond flippy important porno hair and after my doings with the latvian girl.

she, is a whole other story.

bunny mcintosh says:
party on wayne
bum pirate says:
holla
bunny mcintosh says:
i got groceries today and also drunk
bum pirate says:
go look at my bloog
bum pirate says:
at my ass and vag
bum pirate says:
woah nice
bunny mcintosh says:
woah yeah i know
bum pirate says:
u slots
bum pirate says:
they call me raymi the muff
bunny mcintosh says:
nice ok i'll check you out
bum pirate says:
ok
bum pirate says:
cum visit me
bunny mcintosh says:
i will cum yes
bum pirate says:
when
bum pirate says:
this summer
bum pirate says:
we can wear old lady granny pants jump on my bed and put eye liner on each other
bunny mcintosh says:
ok we will have a blast
bum pirate says:
how long would u come for
bunny mcintosh says:
but if you're mean to me i'll fucking burn your house down. but you won't be. actually i'll just say bitch be cool.
bunny mcintosh says:
I have to get money.
bum pirate says:
ill be nice
bum pirate says:
why wouldnt i be
bunny mcintosh says:
I might go live in boston for my internship.
bunny mcintosh says:
you will.
bum pirate says:
woah
bunny mcintosh says:
BOSTON
bunny mcintosh says:
i need to make some boston friendsters or something so i don't have to sit in my apartment all weekend alone
bum pirate says:
itblowsthere
bunny mcintosh says:
naw
bum pirate says:
my ex bf lives there
bunny mcintosh says:
its close to NYC and close to my ass kicking grandfather
bum pirate says:
u can go party in amherst with all the reject rock n rollers
bum pirate says:
nice
bunny mcintosh says:
rockidy rock
bum pirate says:
this guy's chihuaua barfed on the floor and i went cool!
bum pirate says:
he was worried
bunny mcintosh says:
ha ha
bunny mcintosh says:
i smoked free weed
bum pirate says:
i felt mean
bunny mcintosh says:
my friend just had a freak fest at me
bunny mcintosh says:
she gave me a you're out of control lecture and I gave her an "I love you, don't be sad at me" lecture back
bum pirate says:
ew thats gross i hate when people do that, the whole we need to talk speech and then u get all crazy like what what what the fuck is wrong dude serious
bunny mcintosh says:
She has known me since I was 15 and had giant orange wig hair.
bunny mcintosh says:
and she was fat and had a perm and braces
bum pirate says:
i have so much mascara it makes me eyelashes feel like tiny needles evergreen tree style
bum pirate says:
ew
bunny mcintosh says:
she is so lovely but she acts like my mom
bum pirate says:
aw
bum pirate says:
thats nice then
bunny mcintosh says:
i always have so much eyeliner
bunny mcintosh says:
eyeliner liquid sluts
bunny mcintosh says:
she is cool because she could tell people they needed to shut their fucking mouths when they would make fun of me when i was little
bunny mcintosh says:
and mormon
bunny mcintosh says:
and didn't swear
bum pirate says:
i wake up and i look like oscar the grouch junkylike
bunny mcintosh says:
and so punk rock boys were bitches to me on the bus
bum pirate says:
aw i hate schoolbus politics
bunny mcintosh says:
i looked like courtney love this morning cause i had makeup smeared all over my face
bunny mcintosh says:
i know it. fuck them in their asses.
bum pirate says:
gutterpunk

see my pie

this was taken by jeopardy king. boo ya. and also the following

that finklestein shitkid

that faggot tim finally wrote about me but he lied when he said get out of my house or maybe not, probably. i think i am the one that fucked off to toronto u skat.

daydream space station

oh just shut up you're only sixteen.

hey yooooo giiiieees! remember this place?

the story of timnazi

that link is to my friend alex's site. he's in that smarties commerical and other shit too. no one believes i know him. i called him last nite stoned and said really dumb stuff. he went with me to the supreme court of canada party-viewing when i had the norwalk virus and i ate a rainbow-coloured popsicle with some tylenol 3's. the spaniard (ex-bf) was there too but we didn't see each other and he sent me a fuck you email for that very reason. anyway, the supreme court of canada was a short arty film i was in with a guy dressed as a bunny and me as an old man in a field in high park. super 8 footage sketchy silent silly.

this picture is of tyranny aka slow down coolio aka heart attack monster aka aka aka kkk timNAZI. we met on the nerve personals before they got crazy gay and his name was xanax i dont remember what mine was, maybe he knows. we would cab it back and forth all over west of bramptopia and i got him back on pills. he blamed it all on me. one time i got a morphine patch from this boozer customer guy at my hardware store job who had a crush on me and use to bring me tiny whiskey bottles on saturdays and sundays from his 24 of beer and sometimes percs. me and tim sucked out after cutting it in half, smearing it on the back of our necks and arms and then wiping it off. we were scared to experience too much pleasure. now we are angry at that stupid stupid act of a puss-out. stupid people. stupid, stupid people. (shii-ann, survivor).

anyway i took some tranqulizers and brought em over, we crushed and snorted them and the insides of our nostrils turned on fire and we coma'd it the fuck out dude. frank lived in his basement and he had a ponytail and when i walked downstairs i said whats up fags and frank went pffffffffffffft. the audacity of me is just stupid. i brought over a tiny champagne bottle i got from a wedding and tim cracked it open with a nail and a hammer and drank shards of glass. blannnnt!

we ashed all over each other on the bed and watched magnolia and everytime i listen to modest mouse now i think of tim and his ghetto blaster. he slept at my house a few times and when my mum walked in the room she said he's black? idiot. i flipped on her.

and when she drove us places, we screamed at each other the entire time in ice rain and tim in the back going oh my god. i brought him to dirtbag karaoke and he made this other guy angry and look dumb kuz he was deathly in love with me and also was the jew karaoke host with the big gut that shoves it into you when he hugs you and whispers sleazy; "when are we gonna start a band oh you're so hot that girl has the stage presence of a sack of potatoes..." type crap in your ear with gooey hot moisture-breath. can you say vomit fountain?

speaking of which, i shot out one of those at this afterhours in front of darkynazi when he was offering me a dirty key of coke and i said no no that's too much and then ran towards the toilet in my skoolgirl skirt and get-up and saurav was waiting outside and they hated each other and the door magically swung open with hordes of people waiting and watching my beautiful arc of spew.

saurav this one time met me outside of the webcam model building where i use to work in the rain. i had my bike and the spaniard with me. saurav was drunk as hell and wanted a booty call and tried to secretly whisper it to me. the spaniard was miffed, we were to go to this after the film festival party where johnny soporno and giuilia wanted to fuck us, swingers that they are.

in any event i felt bad for the guy because his friends had the keys to his car and his apartment and he needed to crash someplace. sure. i give him my keys and write down my address and go off with the spaniard to the party but i'm wigged-out the whole time, worried saurav is going to fuck up. i sleep at spaniard's kuz i don't want a sticky mess with saurav.

the guy calls me the next day and says he was so drunk he couldn't find my place so he fell asleep on a porch a few houses down, took off all his clothes and slept in his boxers. he lost my keys that fuck and couldn't find them in the dark. luckily/stupidly they were laying someplace with MY ADDRESS too and you know what? someone found the little package and stuck it in my my mailbox, not letting themselves in and looting the place. saurav u retarded fuckbag.

so back to tim. i bought percs from the crazy whitetrashbag at work and me and tim would fight over them. that's about it really 'til i moved downtown and tim followed suit soon after and we would walk to the liquor store in the am to buy grolsch.

and that's the story of timnazi and company.

Patiently waiting
The elevator doors close
Time to fart is now

ok so i smoked some pot last nite but it's ok. i felt like shizer for 48+ friggin' hours and it needed to be done. after not smoking for awhile and then doing so u get loser-fuckeeeed. and i cut out carbs by 75 per cent so my energy was low too. i am wondering if it is hot enough to go tan in the backyard. i'm going to sing a song for jamie. trying to decide which one to do.

strangers who knew each other very well

tim fucking write about me already you louse!

i'm starting to get bacne. ew. it's from my long porno hair and all the fucking on leather couches. heh.

may 5th 00h15;

i'm at work now.
In my grey cerruti suit.
I'm fuckin' bored facing this computer, again.
I know you're an idol
i know you're bipolar, and, honestly, i don't give a fuck.
I'll be reading your blog, and i'm not expecting something special from you anymore, cause i know that you're a crazy bitch, you'll always be, we'll never meet, and i don't wanna disturb your "shitty little word" by turning it into an interesting conversation, cause you're not able to have interesting conversations.
BYE
FRED

you know, everyone assumes i'm chained to a table ready and waiting to have intimate sexy conversations with them via emails, IMing, whathaveyou, it's ridiculous. they get all tanky when i don't respond or say shut up or something. i have armloads of emails like this. i'll put 'em all up at ihateraymi.com one day someday cumday. i apologize fred for getting bored fast of oh i want to nuzzle your neck and whisper shit in your ears ew blek maybe if you hook me up with a hotel room for a few months in gay paree wherever i'll let you talk to me like i am marilyn monroe. i have enough old men pervs chasing my tail.

i'll try to understand when you go down on your knees in front of a man

the difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits

what you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want

and if you tolerate this your children will be next

be thoughtful. not to be a martyr or doormat to be trod upon, but to be aware of other people and their needs. to meet others with awareness and within your own framework be able to meet them halfway and on occasion go the other half joyfully.

our deeds determine us as much as we determine our deeds

perfection is to be what we pretend to be

there is nothing so ridiculous but some philosopher has said it

we are not interested in the possibilities of defeat

it struck her for a moment that she would be happy if everything was dark and empty like this, if there was no one at all in the world, just this stillness and almost perfect silence, and if it would go on forever like that. she stood and listened, relishing the idea that in this space around her just now there were no thoughts or feelings for the future.

the key to failure is trying to please everybody

after i'm dead i'd rather have people ask why i have no monument than why i have one

you kin tame a wild-cat and a panther you kin tame anything, son, excusin' the human tongue

i never seek to defeat the man i am fighting. i seek to defeat his confidence. a mind troubled doubt cannot focus on the course to victory. two men are equals - true equals - only when they both have equal confidence. - admiral yamamoto isokoru

to get off as being temporarily insane is blasphemy. if one kills another merely animal instinct. but to go into someone's home and redecorate, that is considered to be temporarily insane.

a man's presence suggests what he is capable of doing to you or for you. by contrast, a woman's presence defines what can and cannot be done to her

if sound waves carry on to infinity, where are their screams now? somewhere in the galaxy, moving forever toward the psalms.

happy belated may4th bday to lauren yer boy rob lurves you and i do too.

mom i only like black guys now. this is mc caddy cad or whatever and he sucks i think but really i wouldn't know because i never know who is up there doing what i'm too busy swirling around with beer bottles in my hands and falling into girls who want to make me eat shit.

this is me and jonafran. he's been my boy since jr. kindergarden but there was awhile when we wasn't talking. it was nothing personal at all. we just got busy and shit. i kicked him in the shins one time when we were dancing during playtime, smooshed his cheeks so all the water in his mouth spat onto the floor right in front of our teacher and all this other stupid crazy crap. my dad backed into his car a month ago and scraped his bumper all along the side of jon's car. fuck. we saw the whole thing, well, jon did, i was looking through my dad's desk drawers at the time. jon's like um your dad just hit me i'm like are u mad? no, i just wanna smoke a joint. fine. he is the funniest guy ever and he draws amazingly and he tried to teach me how to do skateboard shiznat but in the end i just rode my longboard down this shit-eating hill on my arse.

i feel like i am going manic again, but not really really. i'm a bit strung out from weed withdrawals. i feel pretty healthy today tho, which is good. i'm trying to eat less carbs and less in general. i'm pissed at kristi kuz she's totally avoiding me. she has all my shit. biznotch. important leaf game tonite. i'm at sarah's right now. holla.

im an asshole and what i wrote about my ex bf's was very mean and not everything applies to all of them and i am sorry. my horse ain't that high brotha'

so i took down that post after thinking about it all day drinking half a bottle of benylin and some martinis and telling the story about how i crapped my bathingsuit when i was eleven.

goodnite.

sorry i didn't get the newsletter about short flippy skirts, fuck-me pumps, tiffany necklaces and purses so expensive you want to purposely lose them because they stress you out so much. and i don't know where you go to find sunshine in the middle of winter, an island down the street? and i'm sorry i call you a bitch to your face or a hussy but really i mean it in a nice way. i'm ghetto, ok? i have no tact and i am use to hanging around guys who talk shit and stuff and i'm socially inept. can you please just stop saying whutup if you are a skinny white girl? thanks.

Eli Eli says:
k tal?
raymitheminx.com says:
what
Eli Eli says:
¿qué tal?
Eli Eli says:
what's up
raymitheminx.com says:
oh not much
Eli Eli says:
*wanna cyber?*
Eli Eli says:
no i'm jsut fucking with you
raymitheminx.com says:
who are u
Eli Eli says:
although it would be cool if you put that shit up on the other site
raymitheminx.com says:
ok lets make a fake one then
raymitheminx.com says:
start over
raymitheminx.com says:
ill change my name
Eli Eli says:
i'm english/welsh and i live in BELGIUM
jean-baptiste says:
ok
pretty young box says:
interesting
jean-baptiste says:
t'es chaude la?
pretty young box says:
speak english for fuck sakes
jean-baptiste says:
pff
jean-baptiste says:
you need some variety
jean-baptiste says:
wait what's the address of the site again
pretty young box says:
http://www.sexyfux.blogspot.com
pretty young box says:
im gonna need a pic too
jean-baptiste says:
hmm
jean-baptiste says:
what time is it over there anyway?
jean-baptiste says:
like 4?
pretty young box says:
4 30 pm
jean-baptiste says:
i'm looking for a photo
jean-baptiste says:
but my computer is a slut and a half
pretty young box says:
k im gonna go smoke and blowdry my hair
jean-baptiste says:
well another time maybe
Master and Everyone says:
be good
Master and Everyone says:
xx
pretty young box says:
no
pretty young box says:
lets do the fake sexchat
Master and Everyone says:
oyoyoy
Master and Everyone says:
i just changed my name back
pretty young box says:
pick a name
Master and Everyone says:
gary
pretty young box says:
thats a good one
Master and Everyone says:
but maybe it's not sleazy enough
pretty young box says:
change it to gary
pretty young box says:
no its perfect
Gary says:
ok?
Gary says:
ok.
Gary says:
you could pin this whole conversation up
Gary says:
it would be kinda meta-blogging
pretty young box says:
about how dumb we are
Gary says:
well if it goes badly then you can
Gary says:
but you aren't allowed to edit it.
pretty young box says:
ok i wont and u have to be like ethnic
Gary says:
irish ethnic?
pretty young box says:
just be like dumb
pretty young box says:
lets start out not knowing anything about each other
Gary says:
shouldn't be too hard
pretty young box says:
u dont know anything about raymitheminx
Gary says:
lets go.
Gary says:
no no
pretty young box says:
no what
pretty young box says:
so u found my blog?
Gary says:
are we started yet?
pretty young box says:
no
Gary says:
yeah i read it sometimes
pretty young box says:
does gary know about raymitheminx
pretty young box says:
no he doenst
Gary says:
yeah ok he does
Gary says:
ok he doesn't!
pretty young box says:
u found me on friendster
Gary says:
i don't know anything about friendster
Gary says:
i won't be too convincing
pretty young box says:
ok then
pretty young box says:
any personal site it doesnt matter
Gary says:
let's go yar?
pretty young box says:
ok
pretty young box says:
hi gary where are you from
Gary says:
i'm boston-irish
pretty young box says:
wait start over
pretty young box says:
u have to be the one who starts
Gary says:
riiiiiiiiiiight
Gary says:
hey, a/s/l?
pretty young box says:
hahaha
pretty young box says:
i remember that shit, what is this yahoo
pretty young box says:
canada, 21, female
pretty young box says:
you?
Gary says:
27/m/boston
Gary says:
you really 21 and female?
Gary says:
cos i heard there are guys who pretend..
Gary says:
you know..
Gary says:
17/f/ny is actually 41, fat, wearing a towel?
pretty young box says:
if i was a dude why would i be talking to another dude, i'd be scouring the net for vaginas
pretty young box says:
exaclty
pretty young box says:
wow so you actually have some intelligence
Gary says:
my ex girlfriend used to have a nickname for me..
Gary says:
she called me smarty in bed
pretty young box says:
why
Gary says:
i can't believe i'm telling a stranger things like this!!!
Gary says:
do you like sex?
pretty young box says:
yes a lot
Gary says:
(why? cos i'm totally the smartest guy i know)
Gary says:
you experienced?
pretty young box says:
well you are kind of boring me
Gary says:
hey gimme a chance honey!
pretty young box says:
ok sorry
Gary says:
where in canada, cos you know..if this goes well, we could hook up
pretty young box says:
im not telling you shit idiot
pretty young box says:
canada is all u need to know
Gary says:
hey i'm not some kinda stalker! all the charges were dropped!
pretty young box says:
not funny
pretty young box says:
neway
Gary says:
well fuck this
Gary says:
i try to be a nice guy
pretty young box says:
u want to like cyber or something
Gary says:
shure..
Gary says:
what are you wearing?
pretty young box says:
a scarf and sandals
pretty young box says:
and pants
pretty young box says:
no wait, pink lace pink fishnets
pretty young box says:
other sexy things
Gary says:
hey i want u 2 b honest ok?
pretty young box says:
ok
Gary says:
are you really?
pretty young box says:
no offense but i am really bored u dont talk fast enuff
Gary says:
well fuck this shit, lady
moondog jr says:
no really i couldn't be arsed
moondog jr says:
it's not too convincing anyway
pretty young box says:
i know
pretty young box says:
we are terrible at it
pretty young box says:
pervs always get right to the point
pretty young box says:
ill just use all of this
moondog jr says:
ALL of it
moondog jr says:
this is gonna sound really rude, but seriously are you 21
moondog jr says:
cos you look older sometimes
moondog jr says:
maybe you just have a lived-in face
pretty young box says:
i am 21 just turned
moondog jr says:
were you ever a ski-instructor?
pretty young box says:
lived in face yah
pretty young box says:
no ski
moondog jr says:
no but i guess that shit is useful
moondog jr says:
but now you are 21 you don't get carded anymore
moondog jr says:
no seriously i'm just checking,
moondog jr says:
it wouldn't surprise me if *raymitheminx* is some toronto art-house collective
pretty young box says:
wow
pretty young box says:
u really thought that
pretty young box says:
i am a huge embarassing failure team of one
moondog jr says:
it crossed my mind
moondog jr says:
well you are prolific anyway
moondog jr says:
and you rock the tartan scarf, which is always a good thing
pretty young box says:
thanks
pretty young box says:
i feel pretty dumb lately
pretty young box says:
wait what am i talking about i am a genius
moondog jr says:
well i have achieved NOTHING in my life
moondog jr says:
strictly fuck all
pretty young box says:
that is such a turn on
moondog jr says:
yeah i hate these overachievers
moondog jr says:
i have peaked but it wasn't very impressive
moondog jr says:
lying on the pavement outside my house and deciding it would be a good idea to go to sleep
moondog jr says:
was my finest hour
pretty young box says:
what am i going to do with my life
moondog jr says:
make it your mission
moondog jr says:
to find where they sell belgian beer in canada
moondog jr says:
and if they don't sell hoegaarden, import it
pretty young box says:
im being serious friend
moondog jr says:
and get fucking high off your own supply
moondog jr says:
well what can you do
moondog jr says:
what qualifications do you have
pretty young box says:
im tired of being a no talent ass clown
pretty young box says:
i can write and do computer things and take pictures
pretty young box says:
swim dance
pretty young box says:
drink heavily
pretty young box says:
say mean things
moondog jr says:
do some photogrphy shit
moondog jr says:
catalogue your life, as you do now
pretty young box says:
get arrested or sent away to mental hospitals
moondog jr says:
but do it at a college
moondog jr says:
and get a grant
moondog jr says:
find a patron
moondog jr says:
a 21st century medici
pretty young box says:
i need a rich old guy who will just give me money and make me think i am a success
pretty young box says:
successfully spending his cash
pretty young box says:
sshc baby!
pretty young box says:
brb going for a smoke
moondog jr says:
i'm going for a smoke and a sleep.
moondog jr says:
i just shaved my beard off, and that was kinda fun, but it might be hard for you
moondog jr says:
xx
pretty young box says:
ew that smoke was a gross one

this is my big brother all plastered and pouring his heart out but we couldn't take him seriously on account of the rabbit ears. i love the guy.

this is where i spend all my time sideways on a couch with an ashtray and a glass table and a something...

i'm fantasizing about walking down the street wearing flip flops and holding a 6pack in each hand. i really am. i hope i don't alcohol myself to death now. my mum bought me a betty boop shirt as a congratulations please don't smoke pot ever again bribe/present. ok. so i'm going to drink a lot of coffee and have more cigretz. and maybe i'll only smoke when i watch survivor. we'll see.

man i wasn't getting layed for awhile there and i totally let the muff grow. everytime i'd look at my vag i'd get sad and feel sorry for it and when i mastabated i'd be like le sigh. the swat team pulled up to the party house last nite and now i'm blacklisted. they had machine guns. wish i got a picture. it was bound to happen eventually. after today i am not going to smoke pot for awhile. tyranny finally has a blog. once i clean it up a little i'll link to it. he's a really good writer. so encourage him.