Friday, August 25, 2006
dear everyone thank you for your condolences that is very nice of you i am glad i have a blog so i can VIRTUALLY GRIEVE ALRIIIGHT!
i slept over at my dad's last nite on the couch and after all the wine i drank i have acid reflux like a motherfuck, today is the viewing and tomorrow there is another one then the service then the reception. there were tears last nite, my grandma's death seems to have surfaced some undealt with emotions from my grandpa's death eleven years ago.
i know i will probably lose it tonite and tomorrow it's not the sadness of death or anything cos she had a long happy full rich life and then some it's the seeing my dad cry shit that gets to me, seeing my brother cry too, that might be worse. we were those siblings that made fun of each other for crying during movies and now that we are more in-touch with our emotions there's still a bunch of immaturity present so it's like this retarded laugh crying crap i dunno.
in other news i haven't shaved my bikini area in over a month and it is like insert name of movie set in a jungle and next week i am either going to have it waxed or buy one of those lipstick shaver things that women can use for their moustaches also. the other nite fil trimmed his nethers to try and get the ball rolling and i am like whatever dude still not shaving ha ha.
I got this in the mail from cafepress...cost me a fucking arm and a leg with the American money and then the customs I had to pay (I bought my boyfriend the "I Love Sluts" shirt, too). I know, all the way to BC shouldn't cost that much, but oh well it was worth it.
Here I am modelling how much I am lesbo for you.
I'm not really a lesbo.
Just so you know.
That sounded homophobic. I'm not that, either. I just don't want you to think some creepy lesbian is stalking you or something.
**dear briana, i like lesbians BYAH!
cute how this person tried to be all mean and funny and really stick it to everyone in my comments regarding the ass implants and then once i politely approved the wicked burn they cam back and AGREED WITH THEMSELF ANONYMOUSLY! teehee weinerface i have your ip address.
Ever hear of Photoshop?
08.24.06 - 10:06 pm
Exactly. It is obviously faked.
08.25.06 - 8:06 am
Thursday, August 24, 2006
this chick just reminded me of how funny and awesome i am.
i know can you believe it? sometimes even i forget!
ONE YEAR AGO TODAY
From : JuliÃ¡n Alejandro LÃ³pez de Mesa Samudio
Sent : August 24, 2005 5:01:11 AM
To : email@example.com
Subject : I liked your Blog, not your book
My name is Julian Lopez de Mesa and I am from Colombia (yes, South America). Casual web browsing at 4:30 am directed me to your blog (blogs?). I generally hate blogs and bloggers because they all seem to think that what they say is really interesting when it isn't. Anyway, for some reason yours seems to be different. I liked what I read. Your literary stuff, on the other hand...well....it has potential...but....but...I mean its all over the place. Trust me: You need to focus.
I don't even know why I am writting this. Maybe it's that finally the graveyard shift is getting to me or something. Anyway -again- you do look like someone with whom one can actually have a conversation in Canada - Maybe I am wrong though
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
white dancehall queen
aka honky reggae aidswhore, just saying. dude, put some pants on.
1. just cos yer wearing underwear doesn't make you the number one ass dancer 2. your ass isn't shaking enough 3. that music sucks 3. is that yer feet scraping on the floor or a bird chirping?
we went to see dave chappelle last nite, the 7.30 show
i left my fone at home cos the massey hall website said no fones
then we went to horseshoe to catch the end of pedestrian's set
then we got home at 12
and i got a text from my brother saying grandma died at 8.15 and no one could reach me
my dad and aunt and mom were there tho
i was going to see her sunday but with the relatives in town i didn't cos my aunt thought it would be too much
so while i was LOLing and telling this guy to stop chewing gum with his mouth open my grandma passed, but it was peaceful
funeral saturday prolly
one comedic relief thing though, my aunt requested that this one nurse come in cos she was closest to my grandma i guess and it was her day off but she still came in
sorry but i'm drunk
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
I AM DRAWING A PICTURE OF BAGELS AND I WROTE BAGEL PARTY UNDER IT
WHAT DID YOU EVER DO
IM TRYING TO BE LIKE THAT GUY IN RUSHMORE, SAVING SPANISH
OR WAS IT LATIN
I LOVED THAT MOVIE
DID YOU LIKE THE OTHER ONE?
AS WELL AS TENENBAUMS
YOU DIDNT THINK THAT AQUATIC WAS SLOW?
SAW IT IN THE THEATRE
YER ADD SO MAYBE FOR U IT WAS
DID YOU LIKE THE TOPLESS CHICK?
I WAS LIKE WTF
THEN I WAS LIKE OH YEAH HAHA I DO THAT
BUT STILL WTF SO IT HELPED ME IDENTIFY WITH MY NEW READERS
WOULD YOU EVER BE THE TOPLESS CHICK IN A FILM?
TYPECAST ME ALL U WANT I DONT CARE
THATS LIKE ASKING IF YOU WOULD BE IN TSAR OR WHATEVER
WANT TO HEAR A FUNNY JOKE I INVENTED
I WOULD NEVER BE IN TSAR
TSAR? MORE LIKE TSUCK!
I LIKE WATCHING THEM,NOT ACTIUALLY PLAYING
THATS MY JOKE
IM TRYING TO CAPS LOCK MY CAPSLOCK
ARE U GONNA GO TO PATRICKS WEDDING
MAYBE THIS IS SUPER CAPS LOCL
I THINK MG IS GOING
I HOPE TO
CAPSLOCK TO THE EXTREME
NOPE CANT DO HTML
RAYMI YOU RULE
WHAT MUSIC HAVE YOU BEEN LISTENING TO
U KNOW WHATS AWESOME ABOUT PEOPLE WHO JUST STARTED BLOGGING THEY ARE LIKE HOW DO U KNOW HTML WHAT IS THAT AND IM LIKE I TAUGHT MYSELF IT AFFINITY YEARS AGO
AND THEY ARE LIKE WHO ARE U RYAN PHILLIPE IN THAT MOVIE WITH TIM ROBINS
IE SUPER SMART TECHIE
UH PEEPING TOM THOM YORKE YYYS AND EVRYTHING ON ITUNES I LISTEN TO THE SAME STUFF ALL THE TIME
YOURE NOT BORED OF THE YYS BY NOW?
NO WAY FIL IS
I OVERPLAY THINGS
OH WE'RE INTO HOT ONE RIGHT NOW TOO
I CANT BELIEVE YOU HAVE THE PATIENCE FOR THOM
WELL I GOT INTO THAT SHIT DURING MY FORMATIVE YEARS WHILST U WERE SUCKING OFF THE MEMORY OF KURT COBAIN
LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING MISSY
WHEN YOUR GENERATION BRINGS US SOMETHING AS GOOD AS KURDT YOU WILL BE YEARNING FOR THAT SHIT AGAIN ONCE ITS GONE
OOOH U PUT THE D IN KURT U MUST REALLY KNOW HIM
AND GUESS WHAT I LIKED HIM JUST AS MUCH AS U THIS IS NOT A I KNOW MORE NIRVANA FACTS DEBATE OK
GOOD BECAUSE YOU WOULD LOSE
AND ID HATE TO BEAT ANY GIRL WHO WASNT LOVING BEING BEATEN
HOW MUCH DID HE WEIGH AND HOW TALL WAS HE WHEN HE DIED
DONT LOOK IT UP ON GOOGLE EITHER
LIKE YOU BELIEVE GOOGLE?
AH YOU NAIVE AND WONDERFUL CANADIANS
ANYWAY 125LBS 5'7
OK IF U RIP ON CANADA AGAIN I WILL MURDER YOU
AND ALL THE CHICKS ARE HOT THERE
CANADIAN CHICK WIHT DARK HAIR
SHE DID A FULL ON RAYMI FOTO ESSAY THE OTHER DAY
NG WITH AN LLL
SOMETHING WITH AN L
THESE ARENT EVEN WORDS
I KNOW MY COMPUTER IS LAME
WE NEED TO GET A NERD TO PHOTOSHOP PICTURES OF US TOGETHER WITH HEARTS AND BEARS ALL AROUND US
OR PHOTOSHOP OUR FACES ON A BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN THING
I DONT KNOW HOW
I WILL LEARN IT
LIKE CLIPART, THE SHITTIER THE BETTER
NO ONE "GETS" ME
I LIKE USING "" WITH GETS IT'S LIKE EXTRA SECRET? GETS?
THERE IS A TACO PLACE IN TORONTO CALLED: THE "BEST" TACOS - LIKE THEY ARE FULLY UNSURE OF THEIR OWN QUALITY
DUDE WHEN ARE YUOU COMING TO LA
OR BETTER YET
WHO THERE HAS A GOOD VIDEO CAM
WHEN I AM AS SKINNY AS LINDSAY LOHAN
DONT DO THAT BABY
i don't want to make you jealous but i just bought some whipped onion cream cheese and cheese/onion/everything bagels and well, the rest pretty much just writes istelf.
also on my way to the supermarket, i'm wearing this skirt over my tits like a shirt cos i'm going for the pregnant britney look oh wait it's the same thing inthe above foto anyway this whiter than white trash kid and his dirty retard chick accomplice are chatting and as they pass me they go quiet and the kid as we pass goes NIPPON referring to my nipples and guess what? I DID NOTHING! I LET IT GO! ME! I KNOW! ME!
tho i severely considered putting my bag down, turning around and punching the ugly pubestache off his ugly fucking face BUT I DIDN'T anyway the girl laughed when he said it and if he can reach at least one person then that's all that matters.
fuck i wish i punched him.
And now for something heartfelt..
what's up? how do you do?
I made the trip to calgary for a shoot and the photographer didn't call me back, so I've got a more attractive one lined up for sept. might be trouble..hah
So, I was feeling pretty musically inspired one day and in search of finding a used trumpet for sale I came across your cunt trumpet article. It's funny because when I saw the name "raymi" I pictured you as the chick off queer tv.. hah or maybe it wasn't that show. She was a lesbian brown girl off a toronto sex show or something. You probably know who I'm talking about.. haha anyway, then I saw your tits on your blog and I was surprised for some reason.
Anyway, I was like 18 or 19 and going through the what am I doing with my life stage. I was going to school for shit I didn't want to do but I didn't know any better because I was a nervous and confused stoner when I was in highschool and still then, well I stoped smoking weed. The truth is, I hadn't met any girls who were expressive, or creative the way I was. I have always been the one who upstages everyone, whos friends call crazy and say stupid shit like "you're unique", and highschool kids loved me but even with my friends I felt like no one could match me, and that I was making myself more boring than I wanted to be. anyway, at that point in time drinking my face off, making out with the whole town, skipping class to sew and reading
your blog helped put my head on straight. In some ways i'm not trying to feed you a success story, but at the same time, that's really what it is. I've gotten my shit together, and reading your blog was just there on the side to remind me why I was doing it.
In you I recognized qualities that I saw in myself. your spazz tactics, an imagination that anilates everything in it's path, And innovation. a fucking ingenious way of creating your own stardom. And you know some people hate you, but there are so many more that respect you for doing your own thing. Plus you're a babe.hah.
I think people just want to identify with other people. I felt like I could
do that with you, or the you that I know through your blog. I want to
create something that people can identify with, and that's where I came up
with the label "vixengrity" Its an adjective for an attitude. It's for women
who are doing their own thing, but who come from a common ground, of being
crazy, or eccentric, or just imaginative and a show stealer. The name is
meant to represent women like you and like me, who are powerful and sassy
and but so much more. The clothing fits the name.
who knows you might think my clothing is fucking hideous, but it would mean a lot to me if u would do a shoot with me because in my eyes you hold the name "vixengrity" so well.
I'm still pulling my shit together and i'm planning to take a trip to Europe in the fall before I charge into the whole starting you're own business thing full throttle. So i'm talking a bit farther in the future..
The hassle I've been having from quitting that job just drove me to email you because I quit it so I could focus on developing vixengrity and I felt it was time to say thank you for being a part of my inspiration.
Monday, August 21, 2006
"HURRAY" I'M THE NUMBER ONE WEBSITE THAT COMES UP WHEN SOMEONE IN PAKISTAN SEARCHES ICQ FOR 12 years girls got fucked
notice how icq was all polite and asked if they meant 12 years girls get fucked?
hey guys don't forget that i am very cool ok.
so cool in fact that after a babillion drinks saturday nite i said to fil that i shouldn't have drawn him so hot-looking cos he was prolly talking a lot of smack, he did not like my comment so he took the drawing down and painted over "phil" and then we fought for the rest of the nite and i cried on the couch and then when i went to bed fell asleep straight away but fil tried to uh hug me and in the morning i woke up and was all I AM GIVING HIM THE SILENT TREATMENT so i puttered around for a little bit ignoring him then he said something like I TRIED TO "HUG" YOU LAST NITE REMEBMER? and i was like YOU DID!? FUCK IF YOU HAD TOLD ME THAT I WOULD HAVE LET UP ON THE SILENT TREATMENT TWO HOURS AGO DUDE!
ps i am cool.
yesterday we went to my dad's for a bbq and to meet some welsh cousins i haven't met before and we played in the backyard with a frisbee and a smallish ball that hurts when someone whips it at your bare leg and another ball that is bigger but doesn't hurt and we invented a game where you have to run through the center of the circle and make it to the house and three random people throw the balls and frisbee at you. i went first then my brother then fil and when fil went the one british cousin had the frisbee and hurled it as hard as he could at fil and missed but it hit my mom in the eye and nose simultaneously and blood flew everywhere and her nose puffed up HUGE right away and we thought it was broken and she said just before it happened she was thinking that she didn't want to play anymore so for the rest of the nite she had ice in a plastic bag pressed to her face.
HI MOM! AT LEAST YOUR NOSE ISN'T BROKEN AND AT LEAST IT WASN'T ME WHO DID IT EVEN THO ME AND SHAWN GOT BLAMED FOR IT AND FIL TOO FOR DUCKING.